actually, I'm a sock model
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i wish my penis had a tongue
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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