yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Randomize