sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
