quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
