Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
