Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Randomize
