How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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