It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize