Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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