I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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