I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
