For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
