my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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