sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
