U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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