do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
