I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Randomize
