Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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