Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
