physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize