how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
