Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
