You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
