I hope mine doesn't look like that
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I am naked and annoyed.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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