Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize