id be glad to
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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