If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
