ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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