You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
