I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize
