Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Randomize
