Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
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