i don't like sucking hair
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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