what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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