I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
