Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
