Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Randomize
