she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
It's never too late to be topless.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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