Whod you bang
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I still have a little drunk in my system
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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