12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
