Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
