It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
