Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
