Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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