You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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