There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
this is an emotional support booty call
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize