If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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