he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
