He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
