the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
